If you did not know, I am debating if I should return back to college or continue to be a stay-at-home daughter. I wish to continue my degree, but at the same time I want to stay at home to be a blessing to my parents. I am so torn between the two. I know in my heart that I desire to be a stay-at-home mother, but how do you explain that to someone when you have not a prospect to marry? How do you say, I feel it is my calling to stay at home with my children and you have none? I want to stay at home and prepare, but I know if I attend college and receive my teaching degree it will be useful in the homeschooling of my children. I know you do not have to have a degree to teach your children, but I want to be the best I can for them.
Staying at home has it's perks, but sometimes I believe I am more of a hassle then a blessing. I try to help out where I can, but it seems my parents think it would be best if I get a job. I do not mind having a job or getting one, but the problem is... where? I have applied to many different places with no response. I need a job to continue my education and I need a job to stay-at-home, but let's face it the economy is horrible. In these situations I do not where the Lord is sending me. I do not know what He is trying to tell me. It's in the Lords hands, not mine.
Lord help me to do Your will and not mine. Show me which way to go and what You would have for me, not my selfish dreams. Show me Thy ways Lord. Help me stay on the straight and narrow. Through all of this to grow closer to You dear Lord and rely on Your strength. Teach me dear Lord. Show me.
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